Tuesday 25 March 2014

For the love of.....

She had always loved the lingering,chilly, piercing wet wind that followed the rain, felt alive with the brazen cold winds engulfing her as her skin prickled.
Sunny was never her thing. Overrated, she thought to herself, smirking, every time someone gushed about all things bright and well, sunny !

Yet this morning was different. The sun was out in all it's enigmatic glory . And she loved, loved, LOVED it. 
She loved the warmth of the sun caressing her cheeks. Smiled as the rays, she once complained to be too harsh, kissed her eyelids. She glowed as the blush of happiness enveloped her.

Odd.

Was she having an affair with the Sun all of a sudden?
The Sun, whose power to cheer people, she had dismissed all her life?
Surely not!

What was it then ?
Undoubtedly it was love. 
No other emotion has you acting like a fool, loving all things you once claimed to hate with a vengeance ! 
Ofcourse it was love !
So, rather, who was it ?

She tiptoed back to her room, her feet springing in joy and dance.
At the door, she almost choked with happiness as she looked at her bed. It was basked in sunlight. 
She snuggled on her favourite corner and stared out of the window at the city lazily, gruntingly just waking up to a new day.....closing her eyes she took a deep breath, inhaling as much of the sun as possible !
Standing up, she walked to the mirror. Looked at her reflection.
And it was then that she knew. 
Yes she was in love. She was absolutely, completely, totally, fully, non-negotiably in love.
With herself.
All of her. Her flaws and scars and marks and all the brokenness inside that no one else knew about. All of it !
She was in love, no qualifications attached. 

She no longer hated her left eyebrow for never really arching as well as the right one. She no longer hated the small finger of her feet for being crooked. She no longer found the ring of her uncontrollable laughter embarrassing. The acne marks on her cheek didn't seem to annoy her anymore. Her protruding chin seemed kinda cute too !

It was the newest,oddest and yet most refreshing and freeing feeling she had ever experienced.
To be in love with yourself, your beauty and your flaws, is really the day you start living, yes, she had read about all that fancy stuff, never buying a word of it, never believing it to be at all possible.

But what between being pushed around and pushing back and finding a way, mending broken hearts and healing scars, waking up every day and not giving up, dreaming and struggling, losing and occasionally winning, being happy and trying to make a couple of others happy, existing and surviving, she had fallen in love. Without any warning or planning. Unapologetic love. The forever kind.

Today it wasn't the Sun. Or the weather. It was Her. 
She was the reason, the cause, the effect, the result. She was the story. No introduction, no conclusion. She was enough. Her story was enough. There is no going back now.